When the
laziness begins it embark into self-cultivation of just not wanting to do
anything that might complicate the minds. Sitting and blasting whatever music
that sounds music to my ears how life can be so fucking complicated. Oh well
life just a plain of nothingness but creation of own for now I am lazy. Yes at
times I prefer laying myself with a cup of coffee to ease myself and blast
whatever that sound music to me. A moment for myself, when I am alone my vision
can be more accurately clear thus that is how I manage to express it in
words. Of course whatever that was
written cannot come into perfect absolute answer but the point is having the
reason to question. Mostly people like to follow the crowd blinded from what
they really want. Is it justified? We are merely attachment of all that’s come
by in our life. Each has purpose and responsibilities regardless because of
agenda. Life is a dramatic lesson. What is your purpose here? That’s only you
yourself can configure the answer.
How I may
envy some people, living life as such with tremendous things but then the
envies does not put me down because what I believe all are predestined. My
colors of life is what I as an artist what to color it. Do I want to paint just
merely rainbow? Nope I prefer complexity. No words can describe it only to be feeling by others differently. Every
artist has their own complexity. I do not believed living by others as such my
course of action or attitude makes me into a snobbish person. At times I have a
problem knowing something before it happen thus my action becomes a taboo to
others. I do not like to think in a big crowd. Honestly it makes me sick. Yes
my words are harsh but I am not arrogant. I am not a saint or a religious
person. I am still learning. That’s basically the reason why I do not want to
continue my studies years ago. Not because education is not important but I
believed in practicality and self-cultivate for creativeness. A person does not
just educate themselves to be a student only but must embark themselves
whatever that he or she learn and use it in life. It could be his or her
career, relationship or whatever in life. The point is your life must be live
upon your intention with creativity. Do you? But no person able to accomplished
all. I am still seeking myself what I am best at.
The journey
of life, how you struggle, how you falls ampler times, how to crawl up and
whatever challenges you may takes believe me no person will know your suffering. They may know it
but the pain you when into no person know it. The reality of life only
selective few humble friends that come-by knowing, understand and except your
situation; not allowing you to lose your focus. Each and every entity has
distinguish own struggles. The different between winning and losing is in life
how you can accept and move forward. Winning is not everything in life. What
you achieve and what you can give to yourself and others that is winning. For
every purpose you make must show at least the result.
Therefore I
am trying not because I want to be known but I am trying for myself. If my
action gives a good result I don’t mind shares a bit of my sweat. The emotion
when a person gladly accepts what was given by me to my humble opinion an
amazing feeling, Alhamdulillah. But then human mostly like to assume. Your
action may come-by for what they may think correct as an agenda and question
your purpose. Others may tries to take advantage of your kindness. The reality
of life, if you really kind you just don’t care although you may feel the pinch
of salt. Ignore; not losing focus and move forward. That is a part of success.
What matter most to me where do I belong in the midst of time?
